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Whirling and After

I feel skin patches peel, gears slick and lock and link, turning counterclockwise, winding back time, reversing my life. When was I barely a shape? My body is mostly motion, a roller coaster from one piece of space to another. Motion peers through curtains of fascia, down halls of skin, pries apart pores, and breathes out to join wind, river, cloud, sea.

After whirling, I could remember how my body had once been color blocks in a mirror, silhouettes on a wall. Tubular highways laced through sodden sponges of organs clutching the bellows. I could remember that my body had been contours under fashion trends. Light couldn’t enter.

In a still room, I float. I remove a heavy overcoat and step into a warm tub. I gaze up at first, then close my eyes. I feel lightness, freedom, joints bobbing like water lilies. By the time the river comes to carry the tub away, to spill over me, my skin has melted, and my eyeballs roll under the arcing wave. My marrow rises into rain.

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    1. Kate R. #

      Hi Dunya,
      This piece reminded me of something I wrote a few years ago, because of your references to water. At the time I did not know Dancemeditation, but it reminds me of being absorbed by whirling. Here it is:
      Sub-merged in the sea
      I push my feet off the earth, and release myself from my humanity.
      What am I when I am floating, merged with the sea?
      I am no longer perpendicular, rooted to the earth.
      My feet are no longer feet, as they do not stand and step.
      My hands have nothing to grasp, nothing to caress, they are no longer hands, but neither are the fins.
      The verticality of my body is useless, destroyed. I am neither horizontal nor vertical. All directionality ceases and falls back into my body when I am sub-merged.
      I am a dit, a dot, an ovum; I am the speck that becomes the world .
      The thin membrane of my flesh divides water from water.
      I am a sack of saline, bobbing in a sea of saline, pulled as the sea between the earth and the moon.
      I am a vessel in a void.
      I cannot divide water,
      It is boundless, it is the shape of what it surrounds.
      I am absorbed.
      I am cut loose from my moorings , like a face in a photograph,
      I am adrift in time and space.
      Frictionless, I ride the suck and push.
      I drift, an inertial drift, following the momentum until it dwindles, only to rise again…

      January 30, 2008
    2. Sonia #

      Hi Dunya, thank you for the experience of whirling. I was not sure I could do it…… here is what I wrote after the experience. ~
      My mind, racing, spinning, whirling around until I whirl and whirl so tightly inward I reach stillness. I become a tiny seed of existance. I turn and turn farther inward getting smaller and smaller until I turn myslef inside out and explode into the vast expansion of everything. Ecstacy. I experienced the cycle of contraction and expansion. The cycle of life. This is my dance.

      February 28, 2008
    3. Sonia, this inversion is beautifully put––turning inside out. I love the idea of becoming a seed that gives brith to a new universe of Self.

      February 28, 2008
    4. Sonia waters #

      Yes, I am becoming more and more aware of being fully present in the body. Not only self, but truth. In housing myself, it is as if the seed of life is within me, growing into its fullness of I AM. The holy trinity if you will. Earth, Cosmos and self, together, growing from within. No longer do I need to bring this presence, this knowing, into me from outside, up above. I can bring it up, from my core. It is there, inside, like a seed growing into its fullness. I am still integrating my experiences from the retreat. Thank you.

      March 13, 2008
    5. ann #

      these are all so beautiful…like my practice today near the ocean, continually moving, reminding me of the motion that I am…gently supporting, inviting me to myself, to love

      October 26, 2010

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